moments of time

So it seems, these days the more this shadow followes me the more I feel not in control of my life…  Why does it continue to bother me… it’s here, it’s mine, it’s me.  I’m not one of those people that think, if you think something ain’t that bad, maybe it is not at all… bit more realistic than that, reluctant, but noneless realistic… So when today hits its today and not yesterday nor tomorrow… so facing the music, persay is greatly shown these days… I and I alone had conquer a deeper end of the bargain… unfortunately I feel unwell than ever, perhaps it’s caused I’m emotionaly hurt by my choices I bestowed on myself… I think I’ve kept it quite astounishing for all this time about an event that many of us who are in a relationship deal with… I’ve held it together but it’s time for me to take control again of the  this life I continue to live…. hmmmm…. let me think… I will continue to fight for what I am capable of but and expect no less from me… I have been hurt numerous times but this time… "I will only believe to what is being said by the person that matters to me, if it wasn’t from their mouth, simply nothing but words others made."…

Adultness lives are nothing but hard decision… and the more it comes the harder it gets… sucks but I hold in back of my mind that … "Life is just"    so it is.

To those that are unfaithfull to thier behalf all I can say to you is that Consequences of your lies will only bring harsh punishment to thy self and your love ones… so be truthfull as much as we can for nothing is worse than …

Betrayal.

Disrepected.

Loneliness.

and of course

Broken Heart.

and if you, my reader of this blog … doesn’t quite get what I wrote, then perhaps it wasn’t meant for you, but if you do get offended by it… well all I can say is that… "Good Luck"… for you will need it all when it comes back to you.

*wink*

Seems nothing so real can be true

For something always come better anew

Made me think of all the rest

Nothing better come but all stays for the best

Over and over I cried

Nothing seems to come out of all I’ve tried

Unseen all the untamed reasons that are laid out of my hands

On where I held on my magic wand

I never thought it would all come to this

A distant memory to unfold as only a hopeful wish

Days getting worse as it comes

As these chances only comes once

Bite my tongue and move slowly to the end

Holding on to those that only self intend

Write as much as I can

To let you know who I trully am

Since I only hold on to this weakness

Of all my life’s greatest

For it will all have an end

Slowly as it always began.

- End

Monalisa M.

10/25/06